wabi sabi

a beauty of things imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete.
a beauty of things unconventional.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Reconnecting and 53 Things

I have not posted since the end of September! That was not intentional and I could come up with all sorts of reasons why but the most honest is I didn't think I had anything interesting to say. My birthday is in October and that is always a time of thought, reevaluating, and reflecting. So I have been on an inward journey the last few weeks, feeling like my life is all over the place and trying to find my center.

I have decided to share something I was not sure I would have the courage to share. On Nina's 54th birthday (a few days after mine) she wrote a list of 54 things about her and her life. I thought that was an interesting idea and decided to write my own. It was not so easy! I set it aside several times and tried to come back to it without judgment. To just write what came to mind. So here it is. My 53 Things.

1. I am more shy than not
2. Fall is my favorite season
3. So is spring
4. I would like to be a better writer
5. I am rediscovering my artist spirit
6. My favorite food group is chocolate!
7. I live a bi-coastal life
8. I adore my son
9. I wish I had some musical talent
10. I love to cook
11. I love long dinner and good conversation
12. I dream of going to Italy
13. The full moon give me insomnia
14. I love a full moon
15. I often have a choir of self doubt singing in my head
16. I love art retreats. They are where I feel most myself
17. I don't really know where home is
18. I still love candy corn and necco wafers
19. I love solitude but often feel lonely
20. Shopping malls give me a headache
21. I struggle with depression
22. I secretly love to dance
23. How I see myself from the inside does not match what I see on the outside
24. I am working on that
25. I would like to have the courage to take more risks
26. And dream bigger!
27. I would love to own a coffee house
28. I am very sensitive
29. I would love to design and build a house
30. I think I am a good friend
31. I regret not having more children
32. I will be a fabulous Grandma someday!
33. I have regrets
34. I try not to dwell on them
35. I can be hard on myself
36. I Love Love good coffee
37. I hope I have gained some wisdom in 53 years
38. I would not want to go back
39. My Aunt Alice was an inspiration to me
40. I still have a lot of dreams
41. I don't really like to play board games or cards
42. I would like to write something profound
43. And have the courage to read it in public!
44. I am beginning to claim my talents
45. I love the Rocky Mountains
46. I was a single mother and tried to do my best
47. When I was little I thought I was supposed to be Japanese
48. I want to see Japan
49. I love rituals and symbols
50. Laughter is always good
51. I feel things deeply
52. I have a good heart
53. I try to be worthy